[orangestar]

I know, Im not the type to post rants, and you dont have to reply, but I am soooo fucking pissed off and crying and just messed up right now, and you guys are the only ones I can really trust. Its a long story, so you dont have to read it.

Theres this guy that I am really really good friends with named Sam. He is also best friends with my brother. Lately we've been talking about how we have feelings for each other and stuff. So tonight he invites me over.

It starts off completely innocent. We were watching some dumb Dennis Quaid comedy and talking about stuff. Eventually we start holding hands, and I lay my head on his shoulder. Then he whispered to me "Carly, can I kiss you" (probably the most romantic moment of my entire life) I nodded and we made out for like 2 minutes. I then layed my head back on his shoulder, I was really happy but I didnt want to break the really nice silence. He asked me "Whats wrong? Was that weird for you?" and I go "no, not at all Im just thinking" (I could tell you what I was thinking, but thats an even longer story) Then I asked him if it felt weird to him and he goes "Yeah, just the tiniest bit". I dont cry in front of other people, so I just sat there and on the drive home he used the old excuse "It's completely my fault, I hope we can still be friends, and Im so sorry. But I do really like you. Its just that your my best friends little sister".

So I go "Well you know I had feelings for you, so maybe you shouldnt have kissed me if you didnt feel the same way".

Fuck it, I could go on, but I dont want to bore you all. I just needed to rant.