Last Seen Contemporary Movie

[Roiffalo]

The Hills Have Eyes (2006)
::SPOILERS:: can't keep my opinions to myself today

I actually saw this before the original, and believe it or not I liked the remake BETTER. Surely I was ill. I'm watching them in reverse this time after not having seen them in so long. I watched the original first and now it's the remake turn. Makes me wonder if the order you watch a movie really effects your opinion on it. It seems to mine. Already I'm nit picking ''well that was rushed'', ''your character in the original wasn't a twat like you'', yada yada.

The biggest and most annoying change is the characters. The old man at the station is a douche who instead of warning them intentionally sends them too the hillbilly cannibals, the father and son in law are so dramatic and the younger mopes while the elder takes every chance he can get to poke at him.

-after getting stranded by a spike strip in the middle of the desert-
"Next year I'm going on vaca with my friends!"
"We won't have any more of these family trips you know."
OH THE IRONY.

OMG SHUT UUUUUUUP. The son in law doesn't take a gun because he's a liberal or something stupid. ...In the original it was because he wanted to make sure the rest of the family staying behind had a weapon in case something happened. Oh, no, this was a MUUUUCH better route.

And I thought the blood effects in the original were bad. That has nothing on poor Beauty's demise in the remake. I have more realistic looking stuffed animals.

The canyon of abandoned cars was a nice touch. Excellent actually. I got fucking chills when he finds a baby's car seat because you know what happened to that infant..

Backstory through newspaper clippings is lazy and stupid.

The cannibals bother me... In the original only two of them were a little abnormal... but all of them are deformed in one way or another in this. Yeah that's just what America needs. More influences to be judgmental. "See someone with a cleft pallet? They're probably going to kill you." In the original they didn't have deformities. They were monsters without having to look the part. That kind of message has a greater impact and means something. Wait, sorry, this is horror. Those rules go out the door right?

The deaths in this certainly are more bloody. They take away every fucking moment. Remember that touching scene where son-in-law finds his dead wife and he begs her not to go and cries over her body? Nope. They blew her brains out in this and used her for a jump scare so they could use bitchface son in law for more drama.

I remember at least the ending was better in the remake. It'ssss... about matched maybe? The movie moves so fast up til this point. Just. Explain this, explain that, do this quick so we can get to that. When the boy told them Beauty was gone he just blurted it out. That's the whole movie. Just blurted out.

The end though we slow down and move with son in law. We get to experience tension and let the scares build up a little. And we also see son in law become a big boy. Suddenly a badass covered in blood and sweat and no glasses. The best part of the movie when he got the blood lust flowin'. Makes me wonder how he raised his daughter after this.

Now let's see how the kids are doing.
Running from a cannibal with no gun while you actually have one... I see a flaw in this plan, do you? Who are these random ass cannibals anyway? Please tell me that wasn't Papa Jupe. And again no suspense with that fight scene...

Completely sucks about Ruby. Saw it coming though. "Monsters" seldom live happily ever after. Even if they saved your baby.


Beast doesn't deserve these people.

[Repo'd]

Haha! Roi, you certainly have a way with dissecting horror! That was fun to read.
For me, the remake cant touch the original.

[Roiffalo]

Originally Posted by Repo'd

Haha! Roi, you certainly have a way with dissecting horror! That was fun to read.
For me, the remake cant touch the original.

Hehe, thanks. I didn't intend to get so rambly, honest. Had I known I was going to have so much to say on it I would've put it in my topic. S'pose I still could tho.

Oh no doubt about that 8|
I should never doubt my remake rule.

[Baron Von Marlon]

Pod (2015)
Meh.

The Gallows (2015)
Crap.

[Roiffalo]

The Big Bad

It's on Netflix. Bit of a cheesy monster movie but it's what I like.
"A fiery young woman seeks revenge against the killer who destroyed her family -- and she won't quit till she makes the monster suffer for his crimes."

It's not bad. It's not GOOD.. but it's not bad. A bit on the psychological side. And takes forever to get anywhere. The story was good but I don't think it was directed well.

[SerialKiller]

American Psycho. I finally watched it last night. I loved it! I'm really feeling Patrick's beauty routine too.

[Amalthea_unicorn]

The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water 10/10

[TheBossInTheWall]

Tusk 2014

Alright. So imagine with me. I'm visiting my dad. I'm trying to figure out what movie we could watch together. I'd watched the trailer for Tusk a while ago and remembered my impression being that a bit of an asshole podcaster/radio guy goes to visit an interesting, gnarled recluse who then puts the asshole through harsh treatment to make him tough, or for his own amusement. If you've seen Tusk, obviously its not that. My dad kept telling me how stupid it was, he didn't finish it. I enjoyed it. It made me laugh out loud in a few parts.

Spoiler:
Its very obviously ripping off The Human Centipede, but it's still a decent flic.

Justin Long deserves some sort of recognition reward, specifically for the 2nd half of the movie. He was fantastic. Michael Perks was great, but his role wasn't as difficult to pull off. And the guy who plays his best friend, fuck him because he'll be able to look 20 years younger when he's older. :)

The film was somewhat complex, but not in things to keep track of. In Tusk you get a lot of perspectives and brief moments. These sort of worked, but for me they weren't placed in the right spots.

6/10

[SerialKiller]

Originally Posted by TheBossInTheWall

Tusk 2014

Alright. So imagine with me. I'm visiting my dad. I'm trying to figure out what movie we could watch together. I'd watched the trailer for Tusk a while ago and remembered my impression being that a bit of an asshole podcaster/radio guy goes to visit an interesting, gnarled recluse who then puts the asshole through harsh treatment to make him tough, or for his own amusement. If you've seen Tusk, obviously its not that. My dad kept telling me how stupid it was, he didn't finish it. I enjoyed it. It made me laugh out loud in a few parts.

Spoiler:
Its very obviously ripping off The Human Centipede, but it's still a decent flic.

Justin Long deserves some sort of recognition reward, specifically for the 2nd half of the movie. He was fantastic. Michael Perks was great, but his role wasn't as difficult to pull off. And the guy who plays his best friend, fuck him because he'll be able to look 20 years younger when he's older. :)

The film was somewhat complex, but not in things to keep track of. In Tusk you get a lot of perspectives and brief moments. These sort of worked, but for me they weren't placed in the right spots.

6/10

I've been wanting to watch this!! I've kinda been crushing on Justin Long since Jeepers Creepers.

[TheBossInTheWall]

Originally Posted by SerialKiller

I've been wanting to watch this!! I've kinda been crushing on Justin Long since Jeepers Creepers.

Hah. He looks a lot different in this. Horrid mustache, I believe on purpose.

My parents have on demand(eastern US) so if you've got it you can probably watch Tusk.