I need help with a logline.

[bwind22]

I just wanted to thank everyone that offered advice in this thread. My logline placed in the Top 30 and I have advanced to Stage 2 which is entering the first 10 pages of a feature. (I don't know exactly where in the Top 30 I placed, but I do know it was somewhere between 4th-18th so thanks for all the help.)

30 people out of 120 advanced to stage 2. From stage 2, the top 10 advance to the final stage where we enter the complete feature length script.

If anyone would be willing to help me out again by reading over the first 10 pages and offering advice, I'd be happy to forward a pdf to your email.