[cheebacheeba]

I'll play.

I'm a guy from Sydney Australia. 30 years old 'til January.
Not big on throwing my name out there, but generally speaking I am "B".
I've never had/kept a "group" of friends...maybe one or two people...perhaps in part due to the fact I was from a single parent family that just moved and moved and moved and moved and moved. I never had a home base for more than about a year, and when we moved it wasn't just a town/suburb over, it tended to be interstate.
I have no long term friends, I know nobody from childhood.
My family has been in constant disputes - one half lives across the other side of the country, the other half doesn't want to know me because I'm related to their own shunned relative, my mother, who cannot seem to go a day without some kind of conflict or erratic behaviour occurring.
I am crowd phobic.

I was, as was popular in the 90s "diagnosed" with A.D.D though I have always wondered if I actually have anything more than an unwillingness to conform and yield to any other expectations that my own...I mean nothing ever seemed "wrong" with me, I just seemed to rub authority figures the wrong way.
I played the "clown" bit for a large part of my life, and I think maybe I did it because I thought I wasn't interesting or fun enough for people to want to have anything to do with, it's always been a fallback and to an extent it still is.

I've only ever had what I'd refer to as shitty jobs, my education has been varied but sporadic and completion hasn't always been achieved mainly due to being circumstantially sidetracked or loss of interest.

Earlier this year I tried my hand at what I was convinced was my actual calling, I'd finally settled on something that I was proud of myself for doing, something I found interest in and seemed to me was altruistic in nature...only to find that it wasn't what I thought it would be, and an organisation I thought would be supportive and reflective of my views simply was not.
This is what I wanted to do for the rest of my life, and I was, and am still completely dissilusioned by it.
I still don't know if I wanted to do it in the first place to try and be a better person.

I have zero passion for any kind of job/employment I should happen to fall into at this stage, I can't see anything other than I wanted and it's gone now.
Right now the only thing I care about is "it pays".
I don't even aim high there. If it pays legally, and I don't have to handle any kind of body fluid or garbage, I'm fine with it - unless it's customer service, sales or some kind of call centre work, I've had enough of that soul crushing.

Right now, I work in a warehouse where I unload shipping containers full of their stock, mainly kitchenware. I also drive a forklift at the same place, which has I suppose afforded me work on a more ongoing basis - though I am still considered a temp, while I've been assured my stay will be long term, my employment could simply evaporate at any time.
I don't actually dread this job though I find it rather monotonous.
However, I can always view it as an 8-hour chat and workout if I were to look at slightly more optimistically.

I don't value myself at all really. The friends I have now only seem to annoy me and let me down...and I kind've feel like even though I don't percieve myself to have any negative or "bad friend" traits, even though I'm reliable and help people wherever and however I can, that this is somehow reflective of my own personality.
I try to be "nice" and get treated like a pushover.
I try to be assertive, and people act like I've suddenly turned into an asshole.

I can't connect with my family, and for the most part I feel bad about it even though I can't see it as my fault.

That's the bad stuff...the good, or at least the neutral...

Outside of work, I enjoy gardening, cooking, the occasional videogame even though I'm a bit pressed for time, spending time at home and "doing nothing".

I'm not religious, though I was raised Catholic in my schooling...perhaps it was Christian, I don't know...one of the Jesus-y ones.
I have found many religions to be hypocritical and self serving, and above all self contradictory. Probably on account of being established by humans, the same imperfections come through.
Right now I follow more a system of ethics and conduct...I figure that's good enough. I have no thoughts on the afterlife, though I personally believe there's something more to us than the biological - I just don't care to define that which I will never understand in this lifetime.

I have a partner who I'm marrying in March next year, we're doing this on our 13th anniversary.
I feel like we know eachother better than I ever thought possible, and I can't really rememeber how it was to feel like the guy I was before we met.
We're planning on having a child (hoping for one only) in 2013.
The child is named already, will be called "River" regardless of sex, as it's the only name we've remotely agreed on, and it's kind've cool...life giving, peaceful etc. Perhaps we will consider foreign dialect for the name if anything seems half decent.
I, this is going to sound pretty lame, have actually written some letters to this future child...nothing incredibly deep, probably not even useful information, I just thought it would be cool to throw a few thoughts his/her way from the future "guy that their dad used to be".

I shoot from the hip and speak plainly, even though this has and probably will continue to be potentially detrimental, but it's how I have to be...I've been repressed before and it hasn't paid off, so fuck it.

I don't much like beer, though Germans know their shit.
I love tequila.

I always have pet/s, currently have two cats and a dog.

I don't fear spiders, I grew up in a town known for funnel web population, after that nothing really makes the grade.

I don't smoke, and I'm frankly annoyingly festidious about avoiding it.
I use weed on an ongoing though moderate basis, and being a non smoker I've decided to vapourise only.

Myself and partner have taken up gym this year, and in the last 2 months I've dropped 13 kilos. That's 28.6 pounds, or about 2.05 stone.
Doing this simply because it's about time etc, I've been unfit for the majority of my 20's and I can say that right now I'm in better shape than I have been for at least 8 years, and everything is still a work in progress.
I'm doing this for my/our lengetivity and so that when I have this kid I'll be able to keep up with them and set a good example.

I've recently come upon the realisation though, that really you don't have to do something great with your life to be a good, or even a great person...sure there's dreams, there's ideals, but there's also life waiting to kick you in the face, and I really believe that it's about how you pick yourself up and treat those around you that makes who and what you are count in the ways that matter. At least, that's my self concilatory theory.

I really dislike time limits in videogames, and love the 16-bit era more than any other prior or since.

There you go.