[Zero]

when i was in high school i got in a lot of fights. i have a bad habit of not putting up with bullies or shit like that. my favorite was in english lit class when this 'bad boy' behind me started poking me with a pencil and talking shit - i suddenly got up and pulled him out of his chair and slammed him onto the floor (of course then his buddy punched me in the head and it got messy until the asst. principal came in and pulled us apart - i'd say i got the worst of it - split lip and black eye - but the look on the dude's face when i pulled him out of his desk was priceless).

i'm much more calm now - but as with others my last 'fight' was in a parking lot with a drunk. oddly i was sober. a coworker and i had been working really late and gone to grab a really early (2am) breakfast at a waffle house when this drunk guy with his friends was coming in while we were leaving and for some reason decided we had 'disrespected' him. so he talks shit and we keep walking and then he runs up and grabs my coat. well, i've taken about six years of aikido and without too much thought or effort (drunks are easy prey) i wrist locked him to the ground and left him spewing and spitting up on the gravel parking lot as we calmly got into the car and drove away. the hilarious part is that i'm no great 'martial artist' - i like aikido more for the philosophy and discipline than for 'self-defense' but my coworker ran around telling this increasingly elaborate story of me fighting off angry drunks in the parking lot. i think i got a whole new level of respect after that (of course, knocking a drunk over is really not that complicated)