[urgeok2]

Wow ..

I almost went to jail - or worse last night.

On the way home, i merged from the on ramp to the highway - i had to - the lane was running out.

so i checked my blind spot for the lane to my left - no one there .. i put on my signals and slowly go over. after i was half way over i hear beeping and there's a small silver car going crazy behind me ...

then he gets in the next lane i just left and starts gesturing crazily...
I basicall yelled fuck off and flipped him the bird realizing he either :

1) sped up from beyond my field of vision so i couldnt get in

2) merged into my lane from one father over and didnt pay attention to my signalling.

3) i somehow missed him .... but for a guy who simply had to break - he was acting like a psycho asshole. I would have been apologetic had he not been a retard ... but i really took a long look before merging - so i doubt #3 was the case.


so now this asshole pulls in front tof me and hits his breaks .. over and over again .. i rode his bumper - 1 inch away ... and for a second ... i contemplated smashing into him and running him off the road. (me in a van - him in some small piece of shit)

At this point i'm seeing red - i wanna make this guy pay for every bad thing thats happened to me in my life, for every shitty boss, every fight with a spouse, every arrogant irresponsible asshole driver i've ever encountered ..

I want to kill the fucker and i start yelling like a madman, "DO YOU WANT TO DIE YOU FUCK" - over and over again.

I nearly lost it - i was a second away from doing it when the though of my family brought me back to earth .. followed by the thought of - after 47 years i still have no police record other than speeding tickets - and i dont want one now.

so i changed lanes again - safely - which was difficult because he kept trying to cut me off ... and got ahead ....

oh - and meanwhile he blocked another driver who was signalling to get on the highway....

Eventually out of nowhere the guy caught up to me - so he must have been fllying ... rolled down his window and started yelling like a madman again ... i just looked at him .. drew my finger slowly across my neck ... and the guy immediately slowed down and dropped back hundreds of yards ...

i never saw him again .... but when i got out of the car - once at home ... my legs were shaking.

Not out of fear - but adrenaline rush energy ... i honestly wanted to kill this fucker and there was some primal reptillian creature way deep inside me that wanted what happened ... i wanted to smash into him, or get out of the car and beat him to a bloody pulp. some part of me got off on the experience and was disappointed i didnt get the chance.

thats obviously something i'm not about to give into - but it weirded me out for the rest of the night (and still today)

obviously this guy showed complete dissregard for the safety of everyone around him on the road by several of his actions - leading me to believe further he was a wreckless motherfucker and was most likely in the wrong in the first place.

i was mostly just suprised at that insane flash of anger i had - i've only experienced it once before - when i was 17 - and almost went at my father (looong story)


so .. sorry - had to get that off my chest...I like my experiences positive - and i hate conflict.... but man-o-man ... i suprised myself there.