Tell him, "You look like a horrible evil man with that thing, like Snideley Whiplash...like the Devil, El Diablo!! Aiiiiiiiiiieeeee!!!!" and then pull out a crucifix, wave it around for a second, and run away.
No actually the head thing was the better idea. The argument worked on me once. Who can argue with the happy feeling of a silky-smooth, clean-shaven face rubbing up against your, um......okay, well, you get the idea.
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