Talentless hacks everyone should be aware of
 

OKay, I decided to do this as a public service, i am starting a list of people, who if they are involved in a movie, it should be avoided at all costs. I will start with :

Courtney Solomon (Dungeons and Dragons)
Uwe Boll (Alone in the Dark, House of the Dead)


Feel free to add at will.

Holy shit... The guy who made "House of the Dead" has a fucking phd.....

... disregard previous brain cramp

Marcus Nispel

Jason Burnstien- He hasn't made anything of himself yet and I don't expect him to but there's a chance he could so if you ever see this name attached to a film DO NOT I repeat DO NOT waste your money.

This one would make you good freinds with my wife, she absolutely HATES her.

I think she's pretty good and every now and then she has great moments.

I REALLY hate her in movies. I hate her smile, it looks like the same smile that catty bitches give when they want to say something but are worried they are going to get a chair across the skull for it. And to hear people talk about her being sexy?? WTF is up with that? Her skin looks like its got enough oil to fry a couple batches of potatoes, and if her ass got any wider they could just show the movie on her ass when she shows up for the premiers.

He should stick to whatever it is he got it for, that's if it's not involving filmmaking. If it is I personally think his professor should be shot.

lol, I never really thought about it like that but you're right.

His degree is in literature.....


I thin k i can say, without arrogance, that even without a college degree at all, i can write circles around that asshole....

same here

Yet we struggle and he has 4 more fucking movies on the hotplate....

Far Cry, excellent game, but I fear the worst for the film........Uwe Boll has the script. :(

that's another one he's going to severly fuck up


he's doing Bloodrayne as well, sorry Rayne but your movie is going to suck.

6

Doing bloodrayne? Does she know? I seriously doubt she would fuck this guy:
http://creature-corner.com/nextraimages/uweboll.jpg


Yes folks, that is the face of the enemy....

Ugly nazi motherfucker.....

Hey, i bet moonsorrow doesnt live to far from him. he could take a boat south, then a car, and run his legs over.

Okay, maybe his head too.

Heather Graham- she may be beautiful, but she can't act for shit.
Rose McGowan- See above
Daryl Hannah: see above, except in the Kill Bill flics.
Ice T- He should stick with rap and death metal
Kate Bosworth- they could show a movie on her forehead

Soeaking of giant heads, does anyone else think that James Vanderbeek has an enormous melon?

I dont know what it is... he just looks like his head could double for the hindenberg. I bet they had to buy a special double sized helmet for Varsity blues.


"I dont want, you laf!"

"I dont want your head... jesus, how do you stand up straight? you must have stronger neck muscles than a giraffe!"

It's unfortunate that this Boll guy is also doing a movie adaptation of one of my alltime FAVOURITE games, Dungeon Siege. I just KNOW that's gonna end up like another dungeons and dragons.
Also, FEAR EFFECT! That game had a great plot, as did the sequel, and I just KNOW this isn't gonna be any better than alone in the dark, I assume the same for Far Cry.

I hate to admit it, but, I'll probably TRY and sit through some of these films...and hate them...but hey, who knows, maybe, just maybe the guy has been taking lessons on "how to direct movies that aren't complete fucking uwe boll peices of shit"?

I don't agree, IMO he's the ONE rapper that's proven that he can act, whatsoever. He's quite good on svu. I've seen his earlier movies in which he was just pretty much typecast as his rap persona, and I agree he ddn't show much promise there (even though I enjoyed "surviving the game", it wasn't really about his acting.), however, in the long run, I think he's been getting better and better, just see some of his earlier film appearances, and I'm sure that by comparison, you'll agree it's been on an uphill climb, and by comparison with OTHER rappers, he's definately on top of things, but whatever, each to their own.

I myself HATE Paul Walker - He looks like something out of a gay magazine, and cannot act, not to mention tht 90% of the time he's got that kinda "sexy" half squint on his face that just makes me wanna punch him.

Lately, I've been hating Bill Murray...and think his film career has suffered since groundhog day. Now he only plays BORING parts,
and I don't CARE what anyone says, The Royal Tenebaums was a fucking BOOORING movie, a slow pliot that dragged, and was held up by maybe 5-6 funny lines in the film.
Bill Murray simply isn't funny anymore. It's too bad, because over the years, he's been in some REALLY funny films.
I agree that he OWNED Garfield, but hey...that was only really about the voice.
I just hope he'll return to the kind of films I grew up watching him in, before he dies.

Oh yeah, and I almost forgot, probably the BIGGEST offender - Keanu Reeves. He CAN NOT ACT.
I'm sick of seeing him in films...he's always the same...he has NO range in his acting, one dry performance after another. That, and his voice pisses me off.
I will see "a scanner darkly", but I won't like the fact HE'S in it.

The Tilly sisters - one can KINDA act, but only really at acting slutty. To be honest, I can't tell the difference, nor do I care to.
It's MAINLY about their voice, they both have exactly the same voice, and it's like sticking fishhooks into my eardrums.
Oh, and they both look dumb as all fuck.

That is all for now.

I whole heartedly agree 100%

LIek them or not, Bill Murray has been consistently better than the other old SNL people still hanging around. Dan Akroyd is beyond unfunny these days, and Chevy Chase is just a stupid, arrogant shell of his former self.

If funny ways fire, he wouldnt event qualify as a snuffed-out match.

I don't agree, I don't really have a comment I just don't know how anyone could hate Bill Murray.

How can you even get the thought in your head to mention Bill Murray in a thread titled ''talentless hacks''?

Vin Diesel.

I hate Vin Diesel.

Also Cary Elwes. His "performance" in Saw earned him "Worst Performance of the Decade" in my books.

go watch S.I.C.K. before you give that award out

Yeah, but a consistantly fine film career (up until a point), and being in excellent, very funny films we all remember doesn't make up for the fact that NOW, he's fading away. I honestly have NOT enjoyed any of his performances since G.hog day.
He's done lost his sarcasm that I loved him for, he's gotta get back into some bitier roles...he worked the dry sarcastic wit like nobody else.
I want ghostbusters, I want stripes, what about bob, and scrooged...not this "I wanna prove I'm a real actor" shit...he needs to get back to what he's good at.
I have to admit, I've yet to see lost in translation and the life aquatic, but lately, I've been far from impressed....which is dissapointing, because he IS actually one of my favourite actors of all time, gracing many of my favourite comedies.
I still have hope, but at this point I've all but lost it.

I agree on Vin Deisel...MOST of his films have annoyed me somewhat, he looks the part, but somehow fails at pulling off the tough-guy act convincingly.
However, going on his performance in the Riddick films, I think that IF he was given an appropriote role, he could make for a decent Villain...
I don't MUCH like him, but I have to say, I don't find him to be completely talentLESS.

i thought murray was good in The Man Who Knew Too Little ..
i think he's at the point in his career now where he wants to stick to more mature rolls .. they do that for a while and then try to get back to comedy if that doesnt work out - and then they really suck.

i dont mind Ice-T but as a supporting actor - he cant carry a film


i link heather graham is actually a very engaging actress .. always liked Daryl hannah too.

and rose mcgowan ... who cares if she can act or not :D

jessica alba. words can not describe how much i hate her and the fact that she was in sin city. brittany murphy too, for that matter.

I admit, I had forgotten about that one...that was probably the last film I enjoyed seeing him in post-groundhog day, although, I DID think that by comparison to his earlier films, it was a little week around the edges. It was funny though!

This is what I'm afraid of...the patterns are showing.

So, did anyone see the life aquatic? lost in translation?
Thoughts?

Haven't seen the Riddick films. Are they worth checking out?

I think Jessica Alba has some talent that's hidden under all the sexy dancer/stripper with a fucked up life roles she's getting.

I thought Lost in Translation was great and he did a hell of a job but after reading your post I doubt you'd like it. It does overly drag some parts out but I still enjoyed it. I'm a writer so I'm big on dialouge and story, don't really care how slow a film moves as long as it's good.

i havent seen life aquatic - it didnt appeal to me - and i havent watched my copy of lost in translation yet ...


i agree on The Royal Tannenbaums though.
i'd just seen so many of these quirky little films that i wasnt
in the mood for this one ..
(I heart Huckabees was an exception - it was more unique than the others)

when hal hartly, jim jarmuch, and a couple of other filmmakers started making these types of character films they were fresh and new - but after seeing a bunch of them - they get tiresome ..

quirky for the sake of quirky is like anything else ..when it seems contrived and too aware of itself it stops working.

see honey. then get back to me on that. ;)

you and my wife would also get along great. she HATES both of them.


Jessica alba pisses her off because she read an interview with her recently where she apparently harped on being "Voluptuous" and even "bigger", and couldnt get over her tits or hips.

And as far as Brittany Murphy... well, who Doesnt hate her?

like I said I think she has talent hidden under all the sexy dancer/stripper roles she's getting meaning if she was giving a real job she might do well. I could be wrong.(but I don't really mind the sexy dancer/stripper roles that much:D )

I agree on the Bill Murray debate. I found both Royal Tenenbaums and Life Aquatic pretty boring.I didn't see Lost in Translation.
Owen Wilson.....sure he plays a likable character, but its pretty much the same one in all of his movies.

i dont even know who jessica alba is ...

there are very few north american actresses that i think are 'all that'

mostly either plastic or princesses .. sterile unsexy statues ..

gimme the french or italian actresses any day

the stripper in Sin City that Bruce Willis saved

well in that case, bill murray wouldn't be the one to blame, but wes anderson, director of the two movies in question.