Awesome :)


some of the best feedback i ever recieved here was a few years back from a guy called Stingy Jack, he was also an English Teacher.

Cool. If you have the talent and determination to write and the courage to put it out there - I will try my best to give any help I can. Oh and I did get the answer to my second ? once I stopped laughing and thought about it.

:) yes, the chicken line works way better as an anecdote than a line in the story :p



So, what did you think?

Ok
I think it is a story with great bones.
(I have everything Lovecraft wrote and love the atmosphere)
Your premise is solid, your description is bang on. Perhaps you need to put a little flesh on the bones. Don't delete - just add is what I'm saying. A little backstory would round it out perfectly. Where did he meet her? Was he suspicious? Was there a local legend attached to these disapearances?
Maybe humanize the main character with a phobia? a memory? . . . something. These are only suggestions.
Those who can - do ... those who can't - teach. :rolleyes: jk

Without the teachers, the doers would walk around in circles of mediocrity :)


I can write, but I can barely teach. Luckily, I havent screwed up in that department too much with my daughter...

Well - if you decide to add to it - I'd love to see what you do to it.

I probably will :)

You definitely should. I think there are places that would pick that up, but magazines can be sticklers about word count so usually want about two thousand words. These guys might pick it up in a drafted short form: http://postcardtales.blogspot.com/ but your best bet would be to expand it. Did you like that antho I linked to before?

I kind of cringed when i realized it was about 1200 words, i prefer my stories to be a bit longer (although there are a few (baby jacob, look behind you) that i kept short on purpose)

The antho I showed has a low of 2,000. It's not altogether undoable from what you've got.