Good stuff Skoof.. Very descriptive I had a clear image of the scenario. And just as constructive criticism try and not use so many fifty cent words it sounds pretentious.

^
im not sure if i understand your reply.

thanks for the comments. but the fifty cent part didnt click?

elaborate.

My best guess is that he means "big words"...?:confused: I think...:p

fifty-cent words... expression meaning expensive or overly elaborate words. Its what people do when they want to sound smart.

Cant say it applies here.

Although the thesaurus was used twice, I dont think thats too much.

But thanks for the input . appreciated.

EDIT:

no no, it was used more.
but not as much as one would think.

What can i say, i like using "big words".;)

Disease
 

Disturbing dude.

Still waiting for part two skoof. Dont want to rush the creative juices but hoping you would do a follow up.

I did like this story. (The scary women stuff is a bit creepy, but I don't mind it so much, as it is only a story). You are very creative and a very intelligent writer. I do not mind the use of "big" words. It makes me want to look up the words and expand my own vocabulary. Looking very forward to your next installment.

wow, you guys are AWESOME.

I never bothered on a new installment, cause i figured nobody gives a shit.



If this is the case, maybe i really will bust out a new short story each month.

So you guys think i should continue with this character?

maybe dig into his past via flashbacks?

and develop his character/"adventures" more?

definetly!