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-   -   Blow job etiquette (https://www.horror.com/forum/showthread.php?t=11692)

hellfire1 03-24-2006 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by tachii
ever hear the one about the girl who cannot get rid of a mouth sore? it just keeps getting worse. eventually she decides to see a doctor about it. he decides its best she not know what the problem is; after much insisting he informs her that she had a maggot embedded in her mouth. the only way that would be possible, he informs her is if she or someone she knows works with dead animals or persons.

her boyfriend worked at a morgue.


always found that funny. also funny how some urban legends to repeat themselves in actual life events :D


ok... really... i just gagged. ewwwwww

DraculaInDallas 03-24-2006 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Marroe
There's etiquette? If I'm in love with the person attached to it, and it's clean...it's whatever.
Ahhhh Sugar Butt.....you're my kinda gal :p ;) :D

cheebacheeba 03-24-2006 01:44 PM

Quote:

does that mean you never going down on Cheeb ? ...poor guy
Nono...it's still a here and there thing...my needs are fully
taken care of, I'm easy.

Haunted 03-24-2006 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by slasherman
does that mean you never going down on Cheeb ? ...poor guy :p
That's not as uncommon as it sounds. I never went down on one of my exboyfriends, because he was uncircumsized. I realize that is a cultural thing, but still, unless the dude is really clean, this little Witch ain't goin' down town.

tachii, that was foul. Really foul. Abominably foul. And sorta kinda amusing too.:D That's one of those tales you might need to be in the mood to read. Might want to go back and put a disclaimer on that one. You know, like: Don't read this after eating or Don't read this unless your sense of humor is rather "creative" at the mo.

DraculaInDallas 03-24-2006 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by slasherman
does that mean you never going down on Cheeb ? ...poor guy :p
LMAO :D That may explain why cheebs is a little testy now and then ;)

Haunted 03-24-2006 01:49 PM

I'm just going to rush headlong into this. It surprises me how many of my girlfriends in the past didn't understand that while taking care of the shaft is always nice, spend a goodish amount of time on the tip. It's very sensitive and from what I've heard from my own satisfied men (sorry gang :p I'm trying really hard to be sorta polite) that it's very nice.

dewaholic 03-24-2006 06:57 PM

A Woman's Take on the Subject:

1. First and foremost, we're not obligated to do it.
2. Extension to #1, so, if you DO get one, be
grateful.
3. I don't care WHAT they did in the porn video, it's
NOT standard practice to cum on someone's face.
4. Extension to #3, no, I DON'T have to swallow.
5. My ears are NOT handles.
6. Extension to #5, don't push on top of my head. Last I heard, deep throat had been done. Besides, you REALLY want puke on your dick?
7. I don't care HOW relaxed you get. It's NEVER ok to fart.
8. Having my period does not mean it's "hummer week". Get it through your head: I'm bloated and I feel like shit, so NO, I don't feel particularly obligated to blow you. You just can't have sex right now.
9. Extension to #8, "Blue Balls" might have worked on high school girls. If you're that desperate, go jerk-off and leave me alone with my Midol.
10. If I have to stop to remove a pubic hair from my teeth, don't tell me I've "wrecked" it for you.
11. Leaving me in bed while you go play video games immediately after is HIGHLY inadvisable if you would like my behavior to be repeated in the future.
12. If you like how we do it, it's probably best not to speculate about the origins of our talent. Just enjoy the moment. Review #2 above about gratitude.
13. No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I don't give a shit about the protein content.
14. No, I will NOT do it while you watch TV.
15. When you hear your friends complain about how they don't get blow jobs often enough, keep your mouth shut. It's not appropriate to sympathize OR brag.
16. Just because it's "awake" when you get up does not mean I have to "kiss it good morning".



Disagree except for # 7

Marroe 03-24-2006 07:16 PM

^^ that's what the very first post in the thread was.

Haunted 03-24-2006 07:31 PM

And it's mostly as true now as it was when it was first posted.

Marroe 03-24-2006 07:34 PM

Nahhh....not most of it is true, and the stuff that is....well, that's how guys are. They shouldn't get picked on so much.


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